A diet post

So, I have decided for my own sanity that Friday from 4pm till bed, I will not be tracking diet or exercise. Unfortunately Saturday mornings still happen and it's hard not to load up on blueberry waffles (even if it's the kashi kind with sugar free syrup)!

a life post: the definition of insanity...

Is doing the same thing over and over, but expecting different outcomes. I have heard this a lot lately. Probably on commercials. But hey, as long as you get inspired, does it matter where the inspiration came from?

So, I knew when I woke up today that it would end up being a weird one. I had the most insane dreams last night. One involved me having a mattress installed in my cubicle at work. Another involved me being told that I was ugly and being rejected. Another involved me not being able to answer phones; like a spell was cast on my fingers to not answer phones. Then for a breakfast meeting, I have a little snafu with mobile communications, no biggy. Then the power goes out at work. YAY!

I get home and think, 'wow, I could turn on ghost hunters and take a nap!' But, I asked myself, how is that going to do me any good. I know I will wake up tired. And obviously, the thing I would normally do IS NOT WORKING FOR ME. So instead, I walked Nintendo for 30 minutes at a brisk pace, and then I worked out (FOR THE FIRST TIME SINCE I BOUGHT IT LAST YEAR) on my elliptical for 30 minutes! I must say, I am quite proud of this!

So, it's really quite simple. When I want to get a Sheridan's turtle sundae, I am going to drink a V8. When I want to nap, I will work out. When I want to drink, I will read or sketch. When I want to spend money I don't have, I will go through my closet or clean my house. When I want to throw things or be mean, I diffuse the situation and approach the problem when tempers have calmed.

And I think that takes care of it on my end. All the bullshit self-destructiveness I have wallowed in for the past year-and-a-half will melt away. I mean, it has to right? Because I am --from now on--doing the opposite of what I would normally do.

And as far as situations and people that I cannot control, well its all on them. I can't let anyone or anything bring me down anymore. I can't let anyone or anything let me feel worthless, frustrated, discourage or underwhelmed anymore.

A little more positive than yesterday, but dammit, baby steps!

narcissism at its finest

Just realized that between my blog, my facebook, my twitter, my fitness tracker, google+, yahoo, flickr, and spotify, I have truly become narcissistic.

Oy.

Malignant narcissism

Main article: Malignant narcissism

Malignant narcissism, a term first coined in a book by Erich Fromm in 1964,^[38] is a syndrome consisting of a cross breed of the narcissistic personality disorder, the antisocial personality disorder, as well as paranoid traits. The malignant narcissist differs from narcissistic personality disorder in that the malignant narcissist derives higher levels of psychological gratification from accomplishments over time (thus worsening the disorder). Because the malignant narcissist becomes more involved in this psychological gratification, in the context of the right conditions, they are apt to develop the antisocial, the paranoid, and the schizoid personality disorders. The term malignant is added to the term narcissist to indicate that individuals with this disorder have a powerful form of narcissism that has made them ill in the forms of paranoid and anti-social traits.

a life post

I woke up today feeling really really low.

Maybe it's because in my dream last night, it was confirmed that I look like a crackhead.

Anyways.
All these emotions are running through me. I feel angry. I feel bored. I feel unfullfilled. I feel worthless.
And I am asking if I should feel disdain or be truly sorry. Am I a bad person? Am I ugly, inside and out? Do I deserve to be treated well? Should I be doted on and worshiped? Spoiled? Or should I be spit on? What is my reality check?

I don't think that I treat people badly in general. When I do, its usually accidental. Shouldn't I demand to be treated with respect? Shouldn't I expect happiness? I don't think it is normal for people to always fight and argue. I don't think drama is normal. I see people everyday that don't fight. That don't have drama. Why are we assuming that this is normal? When I get griped at, my reaction is to not sit and take it. I am not going to cower down and make someone make me feel low. I am going to be a bitch. I just don't see why I should put up with that. I am not 10 years old. I will not be scolded for a small little thing, like forgetting something.

I think I am a good sport. I think I do a lot of things that I do not want to do, and usually with a smile. My priorities, I feel, go somewhat ignored. If there is something I want, I have to find a way to get it. A dog, a vacation, a concert....whatever.

I feel unknown. You know that song, "If you don't know me by now, you will never ever know me?" Cheesy, yes, but pretty much sums it all up. Maybe it's that I don't respond in the same language as other people. Maybe I am making excuses. If you don't get kissed, and you don't get "I love you," or a cuddle, or even sitting next to someone, a hug, a meaningful gift, a special night sometimes, a fucking date, whatever, then how do you know when you are loved?

Thoughts of Sojourner Truth come to mind. "Ain't I a woman?'
Don't I deserve some to all of this stuff?
What's the Lucinda Williams song? "Shouldn't I have all of this, and passionate kisses?"

Ah well. Maybe I shouldn't. And I probably won't.

a life post

So, I was scrolling though the last year and a half on my facebook timeline. Wow. What a time. In January of 2011 I had a post saying, 'I am alive motherfuckers!' Because, indeed it was a miracle that happened. Then came a bunch of tagged photos where I gained tons and tons of weight. Now I am not one of these girls that stares in the mirror and nitpicks everything 'wrong' with me. In fact, I know my body, though it has a few issues with internal organs sometimes, can do amazing things and is more resilient than I thought.

So I am going to do myself a favor and get back to being leaner and fit. So new rules:

YMCA twice a week.
No donuts.
No fried foods (french fries, onion rings, donuts, nuggets)
More veggies
No simple sugars (candy, freeze pops)
No milkshakes
Low-sugar ice-cream
no fast food (except in emergencies)
eat out once a week
drinks few and far between
drink water when munchies hit

Those are my problem areas. So at the beginning of September, when I weigh much less, hopefully between 125-135, I am going to schedule me a photo shoot for engagement stuff. This shall be my goal. It seems totally reasonable.

Brand Rennovation

What the hell is a brand renovation? It isn't a new term but one you don't hear about as much as branding or rebranding. Well we are in the process of renovating or refreshing our brand here at our tiny lil' arts org. Our sister orgs are the logos featured below.

It seems like maybe the hole we fell in when we created our very timely and trendy logo was a wide one that lots of organizations may have fallen into. But before I get into that...

So this refreshing or renovation is not like rebranding in that we are not changing our messaging (thought we ought to) or our voice, our programs, our audience or our mission. We ought to, but it seems like it isn't a good time until we figure out what our programs should be based on the needs of our constituents.

That being said, the things we need to fix:

our logo has too many parts. as do all of these logos. the MAAF is a perfect example. Split that pup in two and you have 2 great logos. Southern Arts has lots of S's.

Our logo has a timely, but not a timeless look. the red black logo. the splattery font. the condensed font. the checkerboard thing. bad. bad. bad.

And don't get me started on font. each one of these logos has 2 different fonts. Arts Midwest has 3! brush scriopt with bold lowercase and a monospaced all caps! what!

I could go on but here are my goals for this project:

1. It looks good in reverse, any color, black and white. We have traveling exhibitions and different programs that in a sense, have thier own brand. So if I am doing an exhibition about the Hudson River painters and need to make our logo dark green, or a Sister Corita exhibition and make it hot pink, I want to be able to do that. Instead of being the red and white logo, or the multicolored logo, or the navy logo, we are known as the anything logo.

2. BUT to accomplish this, this new logo shape has to be powerful, strong, easily recognizable and extraordinarily unique. Take color out of the equation of color + font + shape = logo. that means font and shape must be strong, must be conceptual and smart, and must say everything about you.

3. Speaking of fonts. One font. So on any given piece of material we only have 2 fonts. And the logo should be able to stand on its own without a font. I do think NEFA does a great job of this.

Well, I have been doing quick 4 minute logos, printing them and throwing them into a basket. We are going to take these and identify some characteristics and just keep hacking away till we get there. Stay tuned for some more process updates!

Brandhole. Part 2.

These guys again! One of the biggest brandholes in town! We get it. You're "AWESOME" (in your own mind). You went on CBS. That is all I could say about these people.

What about letting your work speak? I recently read Communications Arts, and a fabulous Kansas City company had a spread. They have done brilliant brand design. Unforked, a fabulous restaurant at 119th and Metcalf, though I like the food, I LOVE the branding. Way mo

er their clients all over town.re. Custom Color was also their client. Thier branding went from your typical swooshy 3-D beveled oval logo, to fun, bright, smart, and memorable. I am so proud of this agency! The agency you ask? I almost fogot to tell you because I was so excited to talk about their work! Design Ranch. And you know what, for the life of me, I don't remember their tagline or their logo. I do rememb

Now don't get me wrong. I have met these awesome dudes at Reactor and they are nice people. And it's not personal. I am just saying its not what I would do. And what happens when everyone there is 50? No one wants to see people in jean shorts, neon sneakers, overusing the most overused word ever. Brandhole.

Brandhole. Part 1.

Eh. Carl's Jr./Hardees. All I can say is gross. It's not because I am a woman.

I like hot chicks, I do. But why? Why the gross close up shots of people eating? I get it. Your brand is unapologetic. "That's just the way it is." I like your food. But here is why you are a brandhole. You're logo us

bad. What the hell does a star have to do with anything?

Audrina Patridge is gross. Yuck. Greasy tomatoey mayonasie drippings down big boob cracks. Yuck. Go back to this one.

Something, something, branding.

Another article about branding...

One thing that strikes me about these articles is they always talk about "knowing your audience."

Best of that advice in my opinion is being your audience. Participating and letting the audience be. It drives me crazy when you are at a party and see eone dominates the conversation and no one else can talk. When you do that with your brand or content, you are that asshole.

I guess that's why I try to stick to simple truths like "the arts matter" or "more art for more people," and I try to tell our story through unfussy, approachably human images.

But it begs the question, how can I improve with the same ideas in mind, without turning int the loud mouth asshole that's had one too many?

brain dump

humanfinity

_______________birds of a feather.

drinking from the same pool.

living life aware.

a simple plan.

shiny pretty stories.

--notes on social media

--started as a conversation

--photo sharing contest

--published book of winning entries

--more than 1000 images collected

--collaboration without money

--consider what your audience is doing already

REWARD tastemakers.

contract an out of house social media person?